I Know You Care
by framby
Summary: Blaine is meeting his soulmate today. It should be the most amazing and breathtaking moment of his life. But his soulmate is a man, and homosexuality isn't allowed in their society.


Blaine is sitting in the food court of Lima, Ohio and today he is supposed to meet his soulmate. That's what his timer is saying. He hopes for a girl who will not make fun of his addiction for Katy Perry, a girl who will understand him and with whom he will be able to share lots of his passions. He didn't tell anyone about meeting his soulmate today. For Blaine meeting his soulmate is something personal and he wants to keep it for himself, to allow his soulmate and himself to cherish the moment together.

0000d 00h 07m 48s

He isn't jumping around like he thought he would, he isn't checking his timer every few seconds, he is just waiting to lock eyes with her and to know her.

0000d 00h 04m 26s

Blaine knows that there is only a handful of seconds left before he can see her, smile at her, hold her in his arms.

0000d 00h 01m 53s

Blaine looks around, maybe she'll be the one seeing him first and she'll be the one walking to him. Blaine imagined lots of different ways for them to meet and he wants to see which one it's going to be.

Time seems to stop, and Blaine doesn't see the people around him anymore, they are just pale ghosts walking around. He isn't sure where he is supposed to look when suddenly he sees two big blue eyes, staring at him.

There is a man looking at him. Blaine can see his face is falling and he is turning white, his eyes piercing into Blaine's.

Blaine looks down at his timer, he has to make sure. But his timer isn't counting back the seconds, his time is up and this is the person he is supposed to meet.

But it can't be.

Blaine sees the shiver of the other man's mouth, he can see the small frown in between his brows and the wetness at the corner of his eyes.

Blaine doesn't hear what is going around him anymore, the only thing that matters being this man in front of him, his soulmate. The sadness and the bitterness of the situation send shivers through his spine and he can feel his blood turning cold. Blaine doesn't move, he can't, what would he do?

There is nothing he can do and even if there was something, they are in the middle of a food court. People might see.

Blaine stares at his soulmate from afar, losing himself in the other man's eyes. Because it's all he'll get and he knows it. Tears are threatening to roll on his cheeks but he can't allow them, he doesn't want the only seconds he has with his soulmate to be clouded by tears in his eyes. He wants to see him, to take him all in, to lock inside of his memory how it felt to have him here, in front of him. Because it's all Blaine is getting, seconds.

There is nothing he can do to bide them more time, to give them a happy ending. And there could be so many different reasons for that. It could because he is from a family that isn't mundane enough, it could be that he doesn't look good enough, that he speaks a different language, it could be that their parents hate each other. But it's because he is a man, and it's not allowed.

_No matter what I do, no matter how I look, I'm never going to be enough. I'll never be right._

Blaine stares, trying to express in one single glance everything he wishes he could say, everything he wants to promise but can't and he hopes that his soulmate, from where he is sitting, will understand.

Blaine's body is shaking, because it isn't fair, because in other circumstances he'd stand up, and would walk to this amazing man and talk to him, he'll even dare to hold his hand. But not here, not now, not in front of other people. Because he is a man, and it's not allowed.

Blaine can read the torment on his soulmate's face. He is going through the same storm, and maybe his is more violent than Blaine's.

Blaine bows his head down, his lips quivering as he holds back tears. He bows his head down in shame because he is a coward, because he doesn't have the courage to stand up, because he doesn't know how to convey everything that he is feeling in only one look.

He can feel love creeping inside of him and filling up all the empty alcoves of his body, love bigger than his tiny body and it's too much. It's too much for only one person, that's why they have soulmates. Because love is supposed to be shared.

It can't be, though. He'll have to hide it, to conceal it. People can't know.

Suddenly the muffled sounds of the crowd around them erupted in Blaine's ears. The noises of people around him is all he can hear: the clicking heels on the ground, the loud laugh of a woman, the rustling of plastic bags.

How can they live, how can they laugh, when a hurricane is destroying his insides and crushing his mind? How can they be so unaware of the storm going on inside of them?

He can feel the situation slipping away from him and Blaine isn't ready. Blaine searches for his soulmate's eyes, they are his anchor, because they are the only way he has to his soul. Blaine desperately needs to make him understand, to tell him without moving how he is feeling.

Blaine can't speak those words and neither can his soulmate. People might hear.

Blaine feels the other man's eyes on him, on his face, on his neck. He can feel the touch of his eyes on his skin. He is warm, welcomed, he is home. But he is forbidden and in another reality maybe Blaine could hold his hand, offer him flowers, but not now. People might see.

Blaine is too aware of the crowd around him, and he knows that his seconds are over. He can see his soulmate's body shivering, Blaine can see the sadness taking over and can feel the longing he has for his body.

Silently, in the middle of chaos, Blaine sees the lies they are already carrying building barricades around his soulmate's heart. Blaine can see that he can no longer access the man's soul through his eyes.

_I owned your heart for this fraction of time. I was yours and you were mine, and during those seconds we held the world in our eyes._

Blaine knows it's over, that he has to go. He scribbles down something and tears the paper. Blaine stands up and crosses the food court. There is nothing he can do and neither can his soulmate. His fist is clenched around a small piece of paper that he lets fall when he walks next to the man.

Blaine feels his soulmate's body tense, he can feel the warmth of his soulmate's fingers reaching out to his own wrist before stopping midway. They can't.

_In this reality, we can't be forever._

Blaine allows himself to look back while the man leans toward the ground to pick up the paper. This paper is the best he can do, it's the only thing he can give his soulmate.

The man stands up quickly, tears spilling from his eyes and he runs past Blaine, his scarf floating behind him, while he exits the hall, knowing that Blaine can't follow him. There is nothing they can do. The paper slowly falls next to Blaine, with the words he wrote earlier.

_I know you care._

* * *

**A/N: I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Please don't hate me.**

**Love you all!**


End file.
